Written By: Rhonda Sue Page
I cannot be held responsible for the latest round of writer’s block.
It’s hard to write a blog when you get distracted by cute cat videos off YouTube and FB posts from Kay Miles Marshall all day.
WRITER’S BLOCK SOLVED:
THERE IS UNCONTAINED CUTENESS BLOCKING
YOUR ABILITY TO WRITE.
No worries though. This malady seems to have passed and my brain is being oh-so-helpful this morning.
“What memories can I pull up for you today, Ms. Rhonda?”
(I named my brain – Brian. Not on purpose at first….it was a typo that just sorta stuck.)
“……what I’d like today is everything I have on learning to drive.”
“Yes Ma’am! You should be receiving that shortly.”
“And Brian, Don’t call me Ma’am………It makes me feel old.”
“Don’t make me come in there Brian!”
“No Ma’am!” (He can’t help it, we were raised that way.)
*Sigh* I remind myself I have the Mind Of Christ and move on.
I close my eyes and….. yes, there I am…..learning to drive. I was so young and cute…….and tense……..man, was I always that uptight?
I can still hear my step-Daddy’s words in my head.
“Always drive defensively Rhonda, It’s hard to be caught off guard if you refuse to be aggressive.”
It’s now almost 30 years down the road and I found myself using his words to our oldest son, Stephen.
Stephen is learning to drive. At the onset, I was just as excited and dying to dive right into teaching him as he was to learn. He is an honestly awesome student. He’s nervous but not tense. The right mix of excitement and respect. I’m very proud of him. But lately……
I have found myself starting to loose it.
BECAUSE PEOPLE DRIVE LIKE IDIOTS!!!!!!!!!
I guess on some level I already knew this but now that my baby is behind the wheel……It’s got my MPDM (MommaBear Protect & Defend Mode) working overtime.
Look, if this is you, we can still be friends……but you should know, I’m going to be uptight.
You are making my job hard when you pass us doing 50 in the 35 and flip us off. Who are you really angry with? I’m hoping you’re just late for your therapist appointment.
To the guy who exited the the five lane freeway from the far left lane…….at the very last second……. doing 60…….. IS YOUR CAR ON FIRE?!! I’m trying to teach my child that this ISN”T a video game. They’ll be no re-spawning from that. You are not helping my endeavors.
The Holy Spirit reminds me that my running commentary on the asinine behavior of most motorist is not helpful. And It’s probably not becoming of me to offer them my son’s driving manual at stoplights either.
I confided to my friend Brenna recently that I was becoming more and more tense and not enjoying myself like I did at the onset. She has three gloriously beautiful girls and has walked this path recently in triplicate. Brenna kept it real……..
Trusting God on the road goes far deeper than just putting ourselves in his hands for safekeeping. If I don’t want to end up an angry aggressive driver, I’m going to have to surrender my need to be right. No one is immune. People are going to cut us off and treat us wrong. But they don’t get to control how we respond. That’s God’s gift to us. It’s what grace is for. If I’m ever going to trust God to help me respond in love to all the hate, fear and rejection this world throws at me…..It’s going to be by agreeing with him that the world is broken, but worth it.
Merciful heavens, This isn’t about modeling my great driving anymore…….this has suddenly and overwhelmingly become about modeling my faith……
……..or lack of it.
The last thing I want to do is influence my kids with distrust and fear. That IS NOT the voice I’m in agreement with and I refuse to give it power here.
This is where the rubber meets the road, with my kid at the wheel.
I’m feeling a little teary-eyed so I say…..
“Brian, pull up the one that makes me smile.”
“I’ll do you one better Ms Rhonda, I’ll remind you where you put the picture.”
(2000 – Stephen excellently drives Matt in the mom-powered car)