Written by: Rhonda Sue Page
You know, Motherhood has been good to me. Sure, we’ve had the occasional bumps along the way. But over all, It’s been pretty outstanding.
Now, I don’t watch scary movies. No offense, if you do…….but they aren’t for me. For one thing, I have an overly active imagination as we’ve discussed in previous blogs, and I can’t be trusted not to morph into Stephen King and start offering him plot twists.
That being said………you’d have to live under a rock not to notice the hordes of previews that come out at theaters near you weekly. So I get the basics:
1.) Zombies are no longer alive but they can still magically move and moan. They have the appetites of teenage boys and the ability to painfully adopt you against your will.
2.) Vampires are infinitely soulful, sensitive, some-what aloof creatures. They can gaze right through you with mesmerizing eyes that read like a thermometer warning when they get hungry. And if you can get past the cold pasty skin…………….. at the end of the day……….well, they just want to be loved……….like you and me…….possibly, by you or me………okay, no…just you……..that is, if you are young, pouty, and also highly alluring to werewolves.
3.) Slasher films. In these, serial killers rampage with endless amounts of blood and gore. And no matter which one you fear the most, they can all be boiled down to simply being misunderstood……no, really. They rage against the brutalities of constantly being picked last for hockey……………or forced to wear stripes and not permitted by mommy to cut their own nails.
(Every good parent knows these types of boys should be enrolled in karate at the first sign of trouble.)
4.) Lastly, there’s all that paranormal junk that’ll steal the good sense God gave ya right outta your head and….. ROT…. YOUR….. VERY….. SOUL.….. (Insert bone chilling demonic laugh here………see, told you I could write this stuff.)
I only mention all this craziness to explain the “until recently” I spoke of earlier.
See recently, a few un-named members of my Pak have begun behaving….well….strangely.
It’s been more of a body-snatcher, aliens-among-us experience than a horror fest but I have to admit…..it’s set me back a bit.
See, I remember a time in the not-so-distant past when 4 little words won every debate there was with my kids…..can you guess them?
“Because I said so.”
Boom! * Trump card, played. * No reasons required. * Ta-Done. (You get it.)
And it’s not like this was always pretty…..(sure, I got the pouty lips, the grumpy frowns, the “I’m not your friend anymore”-s) …..it was just always final. It totally worked for me. I had no guilt. Admit it…….It’s stressful to reason with a four-year old….so I didn’t.
Ask me how that’s working for me lately.
It’s not, at least, not really. See four year olds don’t hold grudges. They may still really want their own way, but sooner or later….they’re gonna forget. Most likely by the time they need their next serving of Goldfish with a juice pouch. It’s all hugs, smiles, kisses and giggles again.
Apparently, this changes. I was not notified.
It’s not that “because I said so” is any less powerful or final. It’s just much less fun.
I get some pretty serious looks now when I use that line. Eyes silently accuse me of “just not getting it” right before they disappear for hours on end …………. Leaving me, no doubt, to be denied the pleasure of their company. Even when they do finally emerge for feedings………I can tell……….They remember.
Tension exists where it didn’t before. Talk is no longer free flowing. It’s stilted and usually kept to the minimal amount of grunts or syllables needed to do the job. All eye contact has ceased. Body language reads louder than a sign around their neck stating:
DO NOT PET THE ANIMALS
(…but you should still feed them…a lot)
And again, I’m left to wonder “Maybe aliens do exist.”
Their turn at the English language hasn’t helped either. At first all the acronyms and #hashtags were cute. I freely admit I’ve contributed to the “shortening” of words.
(As we’ve discussed……this is a special ability of mine with people’s names.)
But lately, I’m starting to worry these cute little games are turning into a major problem.
Read an article the other day that stated toddlers are learning to take selfies before they can talk in sentences. Didn’t see that coming.
I’ve been looking for a bag for my Israel trip. Saw one that I thought might fit the bill. It was just the right size for my maps.
“Hey that tote’s cute. I should get it.”
“Mom it’s not cool when you say it……..you’e not even doing it right.”
That look came over me again – like a cow at a new gate. This stance naturally supports my accuser……… but I was working hard to understand the miscommunication and forgot to fake coolness. Wouldn’t ya know….just as they strut away confident of having put me in my place……it finally hits me.
“Oh, for heaven’s sake…………a tote is a real thing ya know!”
Sadly, it’s hollered into the black abyss they left swirling behind them.
Whatever. It’s maddening.
Sometimes I miss just holding them in my lap. Not having to walk on eggshells or wonder at their agenda. I find myself waiting for glimpses of “green lights” letting me know its okay to approach for a hug or sneak a peck on the cheek.
Maybe I’m not as good at this as I thought I was. And I’m becoming more alarmed at how outnumbered I am.
“Hey God………..How am I doing?”
“You’re doing great kid. Hang in there.”
“I’m a little scared. I have the potential to really screw this up ya know.”
“Yep, I know.”
“You not scared?”
silence………..duh. (God never agrees with the spirit of fear.)
“You got a plan?”
“Yep, I got it.”
“You got a plan for when I mess up the plan?”
“It’s built into the plan. What is really buggin’ you kiddo?”
“I love them, It’s hard to just stop and not be all controlling of every little thing. Their world is so much different than the one I grew up in. Letting go is this weird dance of trying to protect and yet still give distance to……….and you know I can’t dance.”
“Come sit with me and see them through my eyes. Each is wonderfully made and I know them by name. I have plans to use them for my glory and bring much joy through them. Fear has you pinned to the lobby…….Don’t let it steal the show. Believe it or not…..I’ve given you the good seats.”
“I can do this?”
“How do you know?”
“Because…………. I said so.”
I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency]. – – Philippians 4:13 AMP
Coveting your prayers,